You have a life, a job, people you care about and maybe one or two hobbies. Sometimes it is even more than what an average person could wish for. Apparently you have nothing to complain about and yet you feel a kind of hole in your heart. Something is missing and you don’t know what it is. But you do know that until you figure it out you will not be entirely fulfilled and happy.
I call this void the missing piece of the puzzle. Indeed, your life is just like a puzzle with thousands of pieces that you collected and added to your artwork year after year. Finding your dream job or dream partner could for instance be part of it. But like every work of art it won’t be complete until you put all the pieces into the right place. Where should you start then, and how to apprehend this void?
It is not tangible
It was easy to determine the kind of lifestyle you like and therefore you looked for an occupation that enables you to have the material elements you want : whether it be a house, a car, a fancy wardrobe, traveling etc. But the missing piece you are searching for is not tangible at all. This means that money can’t buy it. You can’t go to the nearest store and ask the vendor to show you “the single item that will complete your life once and for all and makes you blossom”.
As a consequence, you can see rich people who are utterly miserable. Material things can’t fill their void since it has nothing to do with it in the first place. In the same vein, you can have people who love and appreciate you but if you don’t love yourself how could you expect to feel worth of their attention? Indeed, it all starts from within. Learning to know yourself just like you would with a complete stranger who sparkled your interest is the key.
Who are you?
And I don’t mean what kind of job you are doing or what are your skill sets and strengths. I want to ask you who are you as a human being? What are your core values, your principles, your beliefs? You need to go deeper than the representation you have of yourself and the mask you are wearing in public. This self discovery process is an uncomfortable one because you will unravel some of your darkest fears, dismantle some old beliefs. You will eventually realize that you were not really sincere with yourself and what you really wanted out of this life. All those years you convinced yourself that you could not be more than what you currently are. This is absolutely not true! One life is too short for a person to achieve her full potential. This means that you can always improve and learn. You are not a definite object. You are meant to evolve, grow, blossom.
Find your purpose
Once you start knowing your true self, you can work towards finding your purpose and fulfilling it. It is the breadcrumb trail of your journey. Before you start to live purposely, you are just filling your basic needs: eating, housing, sleeping. Indeed, you are sleep-walking your way out of life! You don’t notice the smallest beautiful stuff anymore. You see the glass half empty. You can’t actually say that you are miserable (compared to others) but still you are not really happy neither. So what are these gloom and fatigue all about? There are signals that you are not being real and authentic.
I hence urge you to find your Why. The reason you want to wake up every morning and go on with your day. The reason you will feel joy and gratitude even in difficult situations. The one reason why even if you loose one of the material things you have right now you will still be able to experience a sense of wholeness. As soon as you find it, you will be on the path to happiness and greatness and won’t want to go back in time.
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